Saturday, April 16, 2011

no horse show

so there is sort of a horse show this weekend and I'm not riding in it. It turned into a "fix a test" which is nearly as expensive as a full clinic lesson, and frankly my issues are bigger than finessing a test. Well, and I'm not heading to a rated show or anything -- I'd rather just ride and improve (not that I'd give up an opportunity mind you but Rol and I together aren't headed there).

And then the weather hit and the show ran long and my clinic ride got canceled. Which also is really just as well -- it was pushing me financially and I'm more happy to spend the time with my family, and doing the things we need to do.

Something shifted.

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

just give me a month

it isn't that I have it all figured out, but I feel at peace with myself about it. I was mad for awhile that my vulnerability was responded to with defensiveness but I've finally been able to see that as a measure of her vulnerability. If that makes sense. It does to me. So it is a place with more room for grace.

Grace is a good thing.

I have been riding regularly, and it is going well actually in that I feel like she's responding and we're making progress. The show this month has turned into a ride-a-test and so costs nearly as much as a clinic lesson and so that made me gasp but I did know it would be more expensive. So I do still want to do it but I'll consider just doing a clinic lesson instead -- an hour for just a little more money. Or a lesson with a judge on the test that I'll likely be riding the rest of the year (which would mean, probably, that I'll go for T3). None of that is decided though.

I will say that bear skin works well.